July 25, 2023
Elon Musk and all that nonsense aside, I'm enjoying spending time reading my TWITTER feed. These days, it's full of shiny AMERICAN MUSCLE CARS that are truly eye candy to someone who grew up in and still travels in circles of car culture. I'm not sure how I managed to get all that on my feed, but I'm willing to go with the flow.
My TWITTER (I don't care for the X idea) feed also pops up the occasional meme that actually contains a pearl of wisdom.
Wow. That gave me pause. I stared at that for a few moments and let it speak to me, and speak to me it did.
"I hope you win the war you tell no one about."
Who among us hasn't fought a private war? Maybe you, like me, are waging a private war right now. Mine is not a battle for health, thank God. It's more a battle of reconciliation with self.
It's not the first battle of my life, and I doubt it will be the last. It's disturbing to have reached this point in my life and still be waging war with myself, though.
I'm not sure I won every battle. My first marriage was a disaster. My current partner is increasingly difficult to live with. What do I need to do for my own sanity?
That's a glimpse into one of my wars. There are many. None of us are so singular that we don't have battles to fight on many fronts. Many people have fights larger than mine, and I do wish them victory, especially with physical and mental health.
Being able to persevere is a blessing. We second-guess ourselves into exhaustion. We hide behind meeting the needs of others instead of ourselves. No matter what, we can't outrun the battle. We must address it as the enemy it is. And we must persevere at all costs.
Sometimes my tunnel is very dark. I think of all that's happened in my life - I was kidnapped at age seventeen, my home burned to the ground, my ex-husband got another woman pregnant while married to me, I buried my father, and I lost the last years of my mother's life to Alzheimer's Disease. I was unable to have children. I lost good jobs when companies failed. I've had friends betray my confidence. I've lost two old lovers, one to cancer and one to Covid.
I look back at all this and I know I will win this war, just like I have the others before it. I know this because I learned the lesson of perseverance.
Keep going. If you feel too tired to continue - keep going. If you feel too alone to continue - keep going. You will win your war if you don't give in or give up.
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www.kckendricks.com
My home on the web- Between the Keys:
http://kckendricks.blogspot.com
Visit my bookshelf at:
https://kckendricks.blogspot.com/p/the-bookshelf-of-kc-kendricks-and-rayne_3.html
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