Saturday, July 17, 2021

The paradox of time (I need a clone)

It seems like the older I get the more I want to accomplish - and the less time I have to devote to new challenges. I don't think I'm unique in that. Time, and the passing of time, is more on my mind these days. My life is pretty full and it's difficult to fit everything in. I continually remind myself that personal relationships should never suffer because I want to spend all my time holed up in my comfortable office doing writer stuff. Case in point - an hour and fifteen-minute phone conversation with one of the cousins this past week. What earth-shattering event kept us yakking for that long? Food, gardening, tree-trimmers, and retirement. 

Have I mentioned here at Between the Keys that I tried to retire and it didn't go as planned? I know I did over at Holly Tree Manor, but I'll share a bit more with you. 

It was one of the strangest conversations I've ever had. I put in my letter of resignation effective July 31, 2021. My contract states I need to give four weeks notice, so I gave them five. That had more to do with the way the calendar dates fall this year and some other people's scheduled vacations than trying to be an overachiever. 

Retiring is generally cut and dried. You hand in your notice, work out the days, and off you go to your "new" life full of extra hours to do the things you want to do. (Did you hear the heavy sigh I just made?) The upper echelons flocked to my office, full of the belief they'd done something horribly wrong to me that made me want to leave. Nooooo. I wanted - still want - to retire so I can do all the happy little things I enjoy. 

They did not like this. They threw the world at me - anything I wanted if I would just stay. They know they can't replace twenty-one years worth of my experiences. Sure, another person can learn my job and do it well, but some knowledge can't be transferred. I understand their panic. 

The upshot is I'm now free to work at home as much as I want. I only need to go to the office when I need to pick up paperwork and/or use the copier to print statements, etc. I retained full benefits. I cautioned them I do have a Final Date that I won't back off from. 

I agreed to this even though it's not my Plan A. Or even Plan B through about Plan Y. I'm already regretting agreeing to it. It's the paradox of time. My time. Time to do all the little things that make me happy. But now I can do some of those things. I'm attempting to adjust my thinking to where these next months will be an easing into retirement. 

Even with having a lot of extra time at home, I need a clone. I suffer from the same "problem" everyone else does. No matter what I'm doing, I can think of a dozen other things I'd like to be doing. Right now I'm blogging but maybe I should be doing the final read-through of July Heat. It's time to load it onto a Kindle and look at it on a device. I can't do both things at once without a clone to do my bidding. 

Time isn't fluid. It's linear and it changes course for no one. We talk about managing our time but the truth is Time manages us. We make our decisions based on Time's unwavering flow. Slow, lazy afternoons are a trick of the mind as much as the busy mornings that pass in the blink of an eye. It's our perspective that makes Time paradoxical. 

I still want a clone. 


 KC Kendricks

Life through the eyes of my black Lab, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce:
My country life at Holly Tree Manor:
Snips and clips on my YouTube channel: KC Kendricks Between the Keys

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